I Am Not A Writer, But...

by Brandon
(Youngstown Ohio)

From Lanard: Ever read an oddly romantic love letter? Well, here's one for the ages. I can't quite put my finger on why I like it but I think it's crazy good! Enjoy.

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Dear [name]

So, I was thinking about you, and how much you mean to me. I started to wonder how I could tell you. I thought maybe I could buy you roses, but rose are so cliché.

Then I thought about playing a song for you on my guitar, but yesterday the e string broke. I was going to take you to see Toy Story, but you have already seen that movie.

I was really at a loss to what I should do. I then thought I would buy a card for you, but I thought I could do something better.

Then I thought of a better idea. I would write you a letter. Only problem is I am not a writer.

I am not a writer, but when ever I look at you I am filled with words. I am not a dancer, but when I’m with you I move and groove.

I am not a pilot, but your love makes me fly high. I am not an actor, but being with you makes me understand Shakespeare.

I don’t know karate or crazy, but if someone were to mess with you I’d learn both. I am not a cook but you are so hot I can cook anything.

I am just a boring man, yet you are the woman that makes me want to climb mountains, fly jet planes, and do flips, just to see you.

When I am with you I feel like a prize winning boxer, a movie star, a rock star, even a sex symbol. You raise me up when I am down.

I am a slob, but when you are around I clean up… Well, maybe not clean up. Maybe, I still don’t understand Shakespeare, and the words in my head are all gibberish.

All the dances I know are from the 90’s, I’m afraid of planes, and I don’t have the time or money to learn Karate or Crazy. I still think you are special.

You are more special than my crappy writing. You are more special than my two left feet. You are way more special than Shakespeare. You are special because you are with me.

Uniquely Yours,